Learn to take feedback yourself. When is criticism abuse? Need more support? If you're worried about your relationship, we can help. Find out about Relationship Counselling. Book a counselling session at your local Relate Centre. Please support Relate with a donation. It hurts to feel the pain, grief, and rejection of being constantly put down by a husband that you love. Let yourself cry like a little girl who feels sad, rejected, abandoned, and wounded.
Your tears will start healing your heart and soul. Being insulted and criticized cuts to the core of who you are. Why is your husband putting you down all the time? My reader thought it was her lack of work. She wondered if going back to work and making money would make her husband respect her again. Do you have similar thoughts?
Maybe you think that if you win an award, lose weight, color your hair, get a job promotion, go back to school, do more work around the house or even get pregnant, your husband will stop putting you down.
If you think you can change him — or his opinion of you — you are fooling yourself. No matter what you do or how you rearrange your life, your husband will still put you down. Your husband may even say he is trying to help you become a better person or a more loving wife. How do you want your life to be different? Now is your chance! Let go of all the things your husband is constantly putting you down for.
Start thinking about who you are, how your life is unfolding, and who you want to be in a year. What changes do you want to make in your life? Maybe you do want to get a better paying job, go back to school, join a rowing team, go on a solo vacation, or even start a small business. Nothing you do will change your husband…but it will change you. If you find a job, hobby, interest or project that allows you to tap into your strengths and skills, you will start to reconnect with yourself.
And you will start getting emotionally, spiritually, and physically healthy. Getting healthy as a whole woman is the most important thing you could ever do — and it includes becoming financially independent. A job will give you the freedom to change your life. It can also help you get money to leave your husband if that is what you decide to do. And make no mistake about it: if your husband is constantly putting you down, then he is verbally and abusing you.
Start figuring out how you can become free financially, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. You might not even be able to change your life right now. Maybe he even left you years ago, or died. You can live with him if you choose — and you can learn how to be free from your own thoughts.
Your husband is who he is. It takes work find your self-identity and reconnect with yourself , but it will change your life. Your email address will not be published. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. I do not think this article is helpful, women who struggle should not obey to their husbands, we are all different snd going through different things.
I try so damn hard. He puts me down in front of his family and always makes me look stupid in front of them. When I cry he laughs and records me. And no one deserves to be put down by their spouse. The above steps are a process that may take time before you see real change. If these problems persist after taking the above steps, ask your spouse to seek help with you through couples counseling.
If they resist, seek professional help on your own. For a clear understanding of what defines an abusive relationship, click here.
Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. What to do ; I am definitely in the red flag zone. My husband is a master with words. As Dr. Sylvie Stacy said on Livestrong. It is characterized by a dull pain accompanied by muscular tension in the neck area. Stress can cause all sorts of problems. So even if you don't initially make the connection, your relationship could be why you're always up at night.
This often happens when too much stress causes hyperarousal, which can upset the balance between sleep and wakefulness , according to the National Sleep Foundation. It's an affect that's truly worth noting. Friends are pretty intuitive in that they know immediately when something isn't right. So are yours always casting concerned looks? If so, it could be that your relationship is wearing you out. If your partner isn't nice, or loving, or supportive in any way, it can leave you feeling perfectly drained of energy.
And as you deal with their negativity, you may find yourself no longer interested in things you used to find fun — like going out, being social, or, you know, leaving the apartment. Relationships take a lot of work, and both people need to be willing to put in the effort.
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